Friday, December 10, 2010

I'M BACK

BLOGGERS!
I've missed you! I'm sorry for leaving, but as you've read below, I kind of had to. I'll explain all of that in a bit. In other news, I would like to welcome myself back by saying cheers (raise glass of grape juice) to me.

Now, since technology has (kind of) been out of my life for the week let me share with you all my thoughts and adventures.

1. Taylor's right. I did cheat.
• I'm just too addicted. An addict has to WANT to quit something. I didn't want to quit technology. "I wish I knew how to quit you." Notice the Brokeback Mountain reference. Anyway, as Taylor said, if you go the week without technology my Journalism teacher will buy you breakfast. Since I cheated and she found out I didn't get it. What she doesn’t know is that after everyone was done, my friend and I went in the next room and ate all the leftovers. Who the fuck gives donuts as a free breakfast? I'm glad I lost. That's a shitty breakfast.

2. I MET MY LITTLE BROTHER ON MONDAY.
• He's Black! I'm sorry, you probably don't understand. I just started Big Brother Big Sister. Clear? We talked about his 5th grade girlfriend and how he's too young to marry her, but maybe one day when he's not so stressed out. He also likes Avatar: The Last Airbender and can walk on his hands. If this girl doesn't want him, I do.

3. Mallory got a job.
• While I on the other hand I'm going through the stressful and depressing process of trying to find a job. Mallory, I'm happy for you. I hope you have fun over there on the dark side (aka Kristine West).

4. Mallory also got her car back.
• Now I miss our car rides to school and Taco Bell together. But not the money I wasted in gas from taking you home.

5. Dear kid in my Foods class,
• Please stop wearing sweatpants EVERYDAY and talking to me AS SOON as I open my book.

6. I taught my English class about Transcendentalism.
• I actually read off a PowerPoint.

7. I suck at taking tests.
• Which would explain my D average in Algebra II

8. Into the Wild is a good book.
• I read it in a week and now I want to go to Alaska to see the bus.

9. McDonald's hot chocolate is super tasty.

10. I went to Barnes & Noble with Diamond Dicks (her name's really Crystal), Kayla, and Mallory and we read Ispy books.

11. I went to my old daycare teacher's house where he gave me a Canadian flag and tickets to a Beatles tribute concert. FUCK YEAH.

12. Nicole Gausch, I miss you.
• You shouldn't be this far down on the list.

13. While on my week of cheating on technology, I basically stalked Comme Un Patron's blog.
• Sara and Alex are two funny ladies and their pictures are kickass.

14. Mallory punched me in the face.
• Literally punched me. When I said "Mallory, punch me in the face." I didn't expect her to actually do it. This is the second time I've been hit in the face. Both of them have been by my best friends.

15. I'm officially going to start writing a book about the Fluff War and my life.
• Well, actually Mallory won't shut up about it until I do it.

16. DID ANYBODY WATCH THAT EPISODE OF ONE TREE HILL ON TUESDAY?

17. Mallory and I have decided that when my book gets made into a movie our intro song is going to be Girl is on my Mind by The Black Keys.
• The actors that play us will also be riding in the car as I jump over curves and almost kill us while the song is playing.

Now as for the rest of my Friday night, it's going to be spent watching Nikita and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

3 comments:

  1. I MISSED YOU SO EFFING MUCH!!!!! I'VE BEEN CHECKING YOUR BLOG EVERYDAY HOPING YOU WOULD COME BACK TO ME AND NOW YOU FINALLY HAVE!!!!! This post made laugh so hard, I kept reading bits of it out loud to my best friend, and when I say bits I mean EVERY SINGLE WORD. I don't know if I found it so funny simply because I missed you or because you're honestly that mother loving hilarious, either way I love you.

    Longest comment ever award???

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  2. Nicole, IT'S BECAUSE I'M EFFING FUNNY.

    Trust me, I would know.

    When you told me you loved it THAT much I actually went back and re-read it just to see how funny I am. Now I sound cocky. Oh, well.

    I MISSED YOU.
    You get the coolest blogger award. You know, cause YOU'RE AWESOME.

    ReplyDelete